Effectively negotiating with other people is, without any doubt, one of the highest-level skills we can develop in our personal & business relationships.
In the following timeless video, Joel Peterson delivers some superb (& sometimes very entertaining!) ideas to the Stanford Executive Education Influence and Negotiation Strategies Program. Recorded back in 2007, what he shares is as relevant today as when it was first delivered.
If you don’t want to listen to the entire 68 minutes now, take advantage of my cliff notes below the video.
Let me know what you get out of it!
- If you develop high levels of trust with the other party, there is greater durability
- Thinking win-win
- REMEMBER: there is ALWAYS a broader accountability outside your own interests (eg my spouse, the community)
- Watch your language (DON’T even BLUFF just once)
- Never use high velocity words – LOWER the temperature, not raise it
- If someone else uses high velocity words, OVERLOOK them
- Be CALM. Keeping the emotional BASELINE low is KEY (<= you’ll be trusted more)
- Creative solutions, relationships with others that you like
- It’s always smart to have someone outside the room to refine, correct, smooth over your errors (“let me check with….”)
- Negotiate directly rather than through third parties
- Your authenticity is something that will be determined by the other party
- Be as pleasant and polite as you possibly can (if you’re likeable you’ll get better results)
- principled (so if lines are crossed, you stand firm!)
- separate the people from the problem
- focus on interests rather than position
- invent options together for mutual gain
- figure out the objective criteria for a win-win
- assess the deal in the light of your best assessment of the win-win criteria
- Figure out your & the other party’s BATNA
- Find the areas where you agree & then the areas where you really need to negotiate